Coworkers with iPods

We got a new co-worker this week. His name is Randall. Randall likes to listen to his music super loud, like we all subscribe to his iPod. Normally, I would just ignore something like this – but today it reached a whole new level of loud and time endurance – so I messaged my bcw4e (best co-worker forever), Penny.

I didn’t know Michael Bolton had the same problem! Small world!

Penny was out at a meeting, thus missing the Randall party shuffle so I sent the following to her in response to her inquiry about the level of loudness:

Randall managed to hit the pause button whenever he got a call. When he did, I just sang whatever lyrics came to mind in my best voice impression of no one:

Randall didn’t give a shit. He kept on keeping on. So I was forced to do this:

That’s right, I Grobaned him. (I was mouthing the words “OH LOOK AT ME” as I imagined myself making it to the top of a mountain singing “You raise me up” into a 360 helicopter camera shot a la Bon Jovi in Blaze of Glory, but I digress.) Randall got really quiet after this, so now I know religion makes him nervous. Which is why I will spend the rest of the week convincing him that I am completely over the moon religious. I have chosen to go with that snake dancing religion. I’m going to call it “Onomonopianist” because I don’t know what the real religion is, and I wouldn’t want to offend anyone with my lack of knowledge about their life path. I started the plan immediately – when my other co-worker asked what I was doing after work, I announced “GOING HOME TO TALK TO JESUS ABOUT MY DREAMS- that Groban really got me thinking, ya know?!” They knew I was up to no good (and joking). However, Randall did not.

Check and mate, Randall. #YOU-WILL-NOT-BREAK-ME-BECAUSE-I-AM-A-WILD-PONY!

Since I imagine me and bcw4e Penny, and bcw4e#2 will have many interactions that I post about here, I would like to take a moment to introduce you:

BCW4e! *hearts and flowerz and unicorn sparklez*

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6 thoughts on “Coworkers with iPods

  1. What happens when he finds out about Makalea, our love child, that we used to take to college with us after drunken stoopers…you know being “Spirit Girls” and all. Jesus ain’t down with that…just ask Sarah Palin or Chick-fil-a…this is going to end badly. Poor Randall…he has no idea what he has gotten into.

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